In Sickness and In Health

Isn't it weird, the way people appear to celebrate sickness and death. Let's be clear i'm not accusing anyone of being glad when people get sick or die, but the truth of the matter is that people's sickness or funerals have become these highly ritualised things whereby everyone visits the ill/deceased's home ostensibly to show their concern.

Now in principle this sounds like a fantastic idea, everyone gathering round showing their support but really the practicalities fall somewhat short in this noble-ish endeavor.

Recently a family friend was ill and had to undergo an operation. Now i personally like the person concerned and know her kids so when my folks said they were going to visit i happily jumped in for the ride. But and here's the shocking part, whilst there I overheard two aunties chatting away to each other: "I didn't really want to come but you know how it is, if I didn't come someone would have said something and then all that damaal would have started"

It's unreal honestly it is. So we've moved from this really sorta nice idea of paying respects etc to the ill and the deceased to this weird societal norm, non-fulfillment of which leads to some kind of social ostracization.

Now whilst this is weird all in itself, what really got me thinking was this past week. I've been unwell had a minor heart op and all of a sudden started getting phone calls from assorted family members. Most of them semi-identical along the lines of "we're making dua for you, be strong, insh allah everything will be fine". Which is all good and well, made me feel really loved until the thought hit me, how much of this is borne out of those same societal pressures and how much is actually genuine?